The Pain

The pain
The searing, blinding pain
That stubborn pain that won’t leave
Pain that’s spreading more pain
How to heal it? How to destroy it?
Some say inducing a different pain will cut through it.
Some say don’t eat.
Some say just live with it.
Oh the age old pain, that I do live with everyday
Smiling through it, cheering others on
Watching them overcome it so easily.
The pain is ugly and destructive, but it clings to me
It worries my kin, it troubles my kith.
Seeing their pain because of mine, I cry and I scream
I lash out and I attack it, but it doesn’t budge
The pain is frustrating and the pain is grotesque
I know I’m not the only one suffering with it but I’m alone in the fight
The fight that makes me sadder than the pain ever did
The pain that defines me
The pain that overrules all that I truly am
The pain
The horrible excruciating pain.

Advertisements

Migratory

He came to the big city with stars in his eyes

Leaving family and friends behind

He wanted to make it big

He had full faith in his ability and his mind.

But where did it lead him?

He is nothing but a rickshaw puller now.

He has a farm back home with a harvest every season

His younger brother already has two children

His plan was not this

To sweat and toil every day

And what does he gain?

Just enough money to get him his daily bread.

He can sing he can act

He can do so much more than just this

He studied in the little missionary school

He made up all these wonderful dreams

But where is he now?

Sleeping on his rickshaw every night.

He was tall and handsome

Black oiled hair and broad chest

He was the pride of the village

They said that he will go far

How is he now?

Bent back and bony frame his sunken cheeks hardly ever turning up in a smile.

 

He still has hopes he still has dreams

He still believes he can make it

He reads the papers every morning

He aspires for love and fame

How far will this take him?

He doesn’t know and neither does he seem to care.

Isn’t it Enough?

Isn’t it enough

The slow poison that you are afflicting your body to

The invisible pain that your lungs are screaming from

And the very visible signs that they are tired and almost giving up?

Isn’t it enough

The pseudo coolness that you try to portray

Just know it’s only you who you are impressing

The fire between your fingers can burn you more than you know.

Isn’t it enough

You hurting the bystanders as well

You treat your body like rubbish

Who gave you the right to do this to your own children or maybe others’ too.

Isn’t it enough

Your saying that you need it to relax

It is all just weak excuses and lies

There is no pressure that can be worth this much damage.

The Original Sin

“You are a girl, give it to you brother”

This was her earliest memory as a child

She was just four how was she to know

This is how it will be all her life

Just give and give and give.

As she matured she got used to it,

She forgot she had some feelings

Like jealousy or hurt or plain simple anger

All she did was listen and provide

She just gave and gave and gave.

She gave everything she had to her parents,

To her siblings to her aunts and uncles

Even her grand parents

Then one day she was given to her husband

What else was left for her then to claim?

Have no doubts, she was also loved,

Beyond any measure by one and all

She was provided with everything she needed to grow

But when the brothers came into the picture

She felt that she had been thrown away.

Was she still being punished for the original sin?

Was this some kind of a test?

That she was not allowed to speak her mind

Did her mind even say anything anymore?

She wondered and wondered and wondered.

 

She had nowhere to run to

She had no place to go

Just the hope of some change kept her going

Her suffocation ended when she saw her two daughters

As reminded herself to just breathe, just breathe.

The River Bed

When I shed a tear

Do you come to know?

When my smile fades away

To you does it even show?

 

Why do we have to be like this?

Why do we have to fight?

Why does it always come to this?

Why does my heart constrict tight?

 

The confusions in my head

Do u see?

The Sharks in my Veins

Do you feel?

 

The wrongs that happened

Why are they so strong?

That the rights fade away

Like the notes of a song

 

My life feels like stone now

All rough and grey and sharp

My eyes are like a river now

Flowing like fingers on a harp

 

The needle of the tattoo that is carved on my heart

Was so sharp that it’s bleeding

But it doesn’t hurt anymore the feeling is gone

The memories are wild and fleeting.

 

The river too will dry one day

The river bed will be seen

Made rocky and uneven by the water

But it will never lose its sheen.

 

Cat vs. Dog

She came strolling in

As if she owned the place

Slowly and gracefully

She jumped on the bed

 

The little cat with eyes of yellow

Her bristly fur of white and brown

She settled down on the comforter

And she started licking herself up and down

 

She wouldn’t respond to anyone’s call

She conveniently ignored the real owners of the room

She appeared all high and mighty

Disdainfully looking around

 

Now if instead of her it was a dog that had come in

All cuddly and playful and soft

How would he have behaved

With us all?

 

He would have come bouncing in

His tail a wagging

Panting and peering

He would have put his paws first on everything

 

His eyes warm and brown

His scruffy fur cuddly and smooth

He would have sniffed around the bed

And then sat down

 

He would have begged for attention

Turning his head towards any sound

He would have licked every one

Before finally settling down

 

So then how can one blame me for being a dog person?

When they are so adorable

They care for you and they value

Any one big or small

 

Both the animals have their own special charm

But can you compare

The cold iciness of the cats

To the warm affection of the dogs

 

The bank stares to the worship

The nonchalant distance to the incessant adoring

The frosty mewing to the affectionate woofing

The sharp claws to the padded paws

 

Some might disagree and some might not

But I have made up my mind

The dog is a more lovable creature

Without a doubt

Yin Yang

The grass grows and then it does not

The flowers bloom and then they rot

The birds they come and one day they migrate

But if you think of it, even the night doesn’t stay

 

Why does this happen? Happiness after sorrow

And it is sorrow after happiness in the morrow

It’s a circle, two sides of a coin whatever you may call it

You can brood about it or in this spiral make your life fit.

 

We laugh we cry

We live we die

We eat we diet

We sink to the bottom or we scale the heights

 

We believe in the stars or we make our own destiny

We let others rule our life or we revolt against tyranny

We find love and we let it go

We resort to the fast or to the slow

 

And thus we try to fit in

And make our lives as beautiful as a goldfish’s fin

We may quarrel and we may fight

But in the end we have to believe that everything will turn out to be all right.